Monday, 2 September 2019


Nnaemeka had a life. Making people happy was his thing.Through creative Memes and comedy skits he  kept himself happy and  alive .Nnaemeka made millions of People happy. He generated some fan base and followership for him self and of course became a kind of star through the reception of his comics  by Cross Riverians, Nay Nigerians .Just when fortune was about to smile on him to become a brand ambassador of a telecommunication company in nigeria, things changed. Nnaemeka's pastor told him he was becoming too worldly." Give your life to Christ and leave worldly acts". This got him .... While the service offerings and seed sowing ll always retire to the Pastor who is almost completing his 2nd house somewhere in Northern Cross River, his Son in the U.S , Nnaemeka walks the stréets of calabar in a faded skyblue shirt and "itwas black Trouser", wakes people with early morning bell and threatening sermons "repent or Perish" ..."No treasures on earth etc",...
Just and Innocent narrative by *AustineLordlaz*
To be continued ...

Wednesday, 3 April 2019


They innocently were called to feature as the little Bride and Groom. In their uninformed minds, they obliged. Such is the tradition everywhere, made possible by the Church? Like John the baptist, they both marched through the aisles as the forerunner of the 'the Bride and Groom ' the elated congregation cheered. Yes,the couples were amazing. Both the babies and the adult.Then comes the ritual of "you may kiss your bride ! Right there, the kids  stared as they kissed emphatically. Junior and Princess  giggled and wondered if they were not supposed to be involved in the ritual which had a thunderous applause from the congregation. Yes,  they should since the society and some Church members would tease 'aaah Junior, your wife is beautiful o,... Eeeh Princess go stay with your husband, etc " 
The day ended, everyone left but something continued. Brother Stanley and sister Njide liked the way Junior and Princess conducted themselves during their friends' wedding, so theirs came and they had to repeat the infant couple as their little bride and groom. Junior @ 11 now has a crush - Princess @10, Who as well admired the Church and society imposed husband. As the Devil would have it ,both were of the same church and in same school. Both developed feelings at their tender ages. One fateful morning after the church service ,everyone but little Princess and Junior had left the children's department. Yes, the timing was right .No one would come in, not anytime soon. Both drew closer with the imaginary voice of the Pastor during the weddings "You may kiss your bride " Junior grabbed the ever waiting Princess by the neck and the replicated the kiss ritual, this time longer than the usual officiating ministers would give. The mouth eating ritual lasted for about 4 minutes and still counting when the children ministry leader Sister Glory, came in. She couldn't believe her eyes!  What on earth is this? She realized that was the wrong question. Even what are you kids doing?, seemed "wronger" (what ever that means /even if there's a word like that) ...
Like the Nigerian government would do when the unusual happens, a committee was constituted for investigation/inquiry , and of course there will always be a sub committee. Not too long, the committee tendered their shocker report...Princess was a month pregnant! 
What the church has joined, let no man put asunder! See you Next week. 
Let the discourse begin!  Hit the comment box

Austine Lordlaz is a Professional Film,  TV and Theatre Director. A Writer, Teacher, Poet,Critic, producer, audio-visual editor and  and content creator with precision and passion. He holds  a master’s degree in directing for TV, film and theatre and B.A in THeatre Arts. Austine has a couple of  feature films, TV, radio, theatre and published works to his credit. contact :phone +2348067928977

Monday, 18 March 2019


They couldn't even allow the hungry ones end the bastardized chorus of ''now the day is over...'' 'they stylishly located their rendezvous -the old rusted water-tank nestling the principal's window, served a great cover. Thanks to the abandoned Principal's Cushion,- It was a bed enough. The principal who had left the school at 12:45pm made things easier as both had watched him whisk away in his rickety Toyota pencil light Camry as always. 
Some students knew Senior Teddy and The Labour prefect Pamela would always be missing in the closing assembly, but never bothered asking why. As noisy as  the chant and  students get, the better the duo.Great background sound effect for the moment.
Teddy and Pamela had taken their positions and within a second split , thrusting was in full gear. it was that fast.Just at the point some humans in such frenzy would damn everything in the world, Mr Okon the security man appeared from no where. shocked, fixed, Stock and motionless, he watched them lustfully and patiently with his phallus forming a bulge larger than those seen in some Big brother Naija reality TV. Oblivious of Mr. Okon ,Teddy thrusted faster, while Pamela  invoked every ancestral name she could recall as many ladies in such hot seat do ,( but this time ,a hot Bed) . The hots and romp  The humping, banging and shagging gradually fizzled like a dying generator. There was calm in the world. Then, comes the  Anagnorisis or that point of recognition in drama. The very patient but burning Mr. Okon. He had his eyes fixed on Pamela's fire balls. The look says it all .
...Mr. Okon requests to have his share of the feast if he must pretend he saw nothing. 
A refusal by Teddy and Pamela heightened the tension. 'Imagine what will happen when I report you to the Principal,... the expulsion and disgrace, your parents, the mockery, Mr. Okon added. Pamela took the boldness and gave the gate-man a chance to have a bite of the noon snack on the condition that Teddy doesn't stand there as a solo spectator the way  some persons do in adult movies  .
Teddy obliged shamefully and left, while Mr Okon assumed his position. Just as he was about to thrust in... Something happened...

watch this space for MORE

Austine Lordlaz is a Professional Film,  TV and Theatre Director. A Writer, Teacher, Poet,Critic, producer, audio-visual editor and  and content creator with precision and passion. He holds  a master’s degree in directing for TV, film and theatre and B.A in THeatre Arts. Austine has a couple of  feature films, TV, radio, theatre and published works to his credit. contact :phone +2348067928977

Friday, 14 September 2018


Home the movie poster

The social space was set agog weeks ago following  the online premiere of the child rights film “Home ” by Austine Lordlaz  This attracted the attention of top Nigerian  blogs like bellanaija, , Nollywood Obsever  who joined the trend to review the film with great ratings. Home which was made public online via YouTube is part of the producers’ effort to make the film available to a wider audience free of charge. The first week of it screening generated over 15 thousand reactions across the social media and 9k likes on Facebook.

Child Neglect is the ongoing failure to meet a child's basic needs and is the most common form of child abuse. A child may be put in danger or not protected from physical or emotional harm. They may not get the love, care and attention they need from their parents. Many children today in Nigeria and the world at large suffer from parental neglect which mostly stem from misunderstanding, misconception, quarrel and fight between parents and relatives. When these conflicts remain open, unattended to and unresolved, they take toll on the children.

Calabar the capital city of Cross River state is among the cities in Nigeria with highest number of abandoned and neglected children in the streets. The effect of this cannot be over emphasized as they (abandoned Children) roam the streets and have constantly grown into nightmares for the society which they believe has been hostile to them.It is against this back drop that the director Austine Lordlaz and crew chose to make a the film.

The short film Home  tells the true life story of a six-year old Junior who is caught in the web of parental conflict. Junior struggles against the odds of parental neglect and marriage-long quarrel and fight leads to a tragedy that otherwise would have been avoided.
The director and producer of the Home  , Austine Lordlaz uses the film to lend a voice against  the rising child neglect and abandonment in Calabar ,cross river state and the country at large.  The production crew has more plans of engaging in select community screening of the film to more Nigerian audience .This is aimed at furthering the campaign against child abandonment and neglect.
Greenwich Media Plus and Clay Torch productions partnered , Jaymoni  entertainment  to produce the film.

Crew members of the film include

Marvelous Eneji –Sound

Riyo david – Production Coordinator

Joshua Okemiri –Location Manager

Bencourage Odey – production Manager

Nancy Osima – Wardrobe

Immanuel Ikpeme  -Runner

Elai Okodiya – Gaffer

Jonathan Ogolo – Cinematographer/ Camera operator 

Jesam Ebri Okoi – Executive Producer

Austine Lordlaz - Director/ Writer/ Producer/ Editor

Tuesday, 17 July 2018


Just this morning, the window to my apartment which always affords me privileged gossips from my neighbor’s did it again. This time, not the usual quarrel which always precedes or should I say ushers in moans and groans from his corner, often sickening and making me want to relocate. Today birthed something new, is it?, maybe I have been ignorant of? Well, which ever it is, this filtered in as soon as one of his “student customers" arrived.

GUY:  hey, what’s up you didn't come for the exams yesterday 
GIRL : hmmm, what's the need?  Is it not Dr. XYZ's course? What's the need of going for the exam and paying 15 thousand naira after writing?  
BOY :  oh yeah, na true sef , but you …

The conversation kicked more, and I was made a guest from a stone throw .The Proverbial walls with ears  exposed me to some of the tricks involved in the bizarre form of examination administered and abetted by ‘some’ Lecturers.(thanks to whoever  first imagined, walls have ears) 
Before another thing would start in the room, I got immersed in these puzzles:

Does the school authority know some lecturers administer exams to students in hotels where they write to make up for the money(ies) they are made to pay? 

Does the school Authority know that some department’s admin staff who they trust with examination papers transact same with students? 

How can vulnerable lecturers with little or no resistance to students' monetary inducement and sexual harassment be protected. ( ie ,If at all they need protection or are worthy of being teachers) 

Can students apply for a remark, should they get unjustly marked down? 

When did Class Deans and representatives become tax collectors who coordinate shady deals for "some" lecturers who appointed them? 

Do we really know these things we think do not matter, are responsible for many distinctions that can't be defended by their holders? 

Do we know they are responsible for the rejection/return of Corps members who can't even write a letter to their Zonal Inspectors, talk more of teaching primary school pupils ?

Do we know these students end up being the never do wells in who represent us at various levels in government?

Do we know, same students they transact marks with sometimes find their ways in our institutions of learning? And guess what? as your children's /ward’s lecturers and teachers. 
Certainly, what goes around comes around. 
The spiral effect can't be escaped, because Karma could be very patient man, always at the waiting lounge.
Well, a knock on my door brought me back. I have a film to shoot. And for the funny “ringtone” from my neighbor’s, I’m sure I won’t hear it today, because there’s work to do. And when I come back, I will have a talk with him… certainly. Austine Lordlaz (c)2018

Austine Lordlaz is a Professional Film,  TV and Theatre Director. A Writer,  Poet,Critic, producer, audio-visual editor and production manager with precision and passion. He holds  a master’s degree in directing for TV, film and theatre. He has a couple of  feature films, TV, radio, theatre and published works to his credit. contact :phone +2348067928977

Sunday, 8 July 2018

Irrationality,Gullibility,Common Sense Vs Christianity

 Irrationality,Gullibility,Common Sense  Vs Christianity 

I made out time to attend a night of miracles and wonders in one of those trending churches (Name with held) .They sang, worshiped and prayed while we waited for  the Pastor's moment of anticipated wonder of the night. 
Suddenly, The spinning generator supplying power fizzled out. It was out of fuel. The official responsible for power (One brother Mathew) forgot to buy fuel for the night)  The time was 1.30am and certainly no fuel station was close and movement at such time? Risky. 
The Pastor appeared, and immediately everyone  began to bind, cast and accuse the devil whom to many appeared to be responsible for the drained fuel in the generator  and maybe brother Matthew's forgetfulness or oversight? 
Something must be done, and fast. The Pastor called on brother Matthew to keep two buckets in the male and female conveniences of the church. 
Immediately that was executed, the Pastor asked everyone to  individually into the convenience to pee into the buckets, after which he would pray and their collected urine would be converted into  fuel. 
I got perturbed and disturbed as the church members filed into the rest rooms, one after the other. I had read of the biblical miracle of water into wine, but though I believe in the wonders of Christ, my mind could not just water down or make good meaning off the on going urine ritual. So, I said to my friend who invited me : "Babe, I will not forgive myself if I participate in this. It's irrational to me. I detest gullibility of every kind. Let it not be said that I made the anticipated Urine to Fuel wonder of the night invalid. I ll go home right away. I will be expecting details of the night's exercise when you return ". So, I left,while she branded me "doubtful Thomas and Unbeliever" (her exact words) 
Sad enough the story went sour when we met later in the day. She began in a subdued tone. "... You see eeh, do you know people can frustrate someone's  effort? after 45 minutes of prayer, the urine remained the same".I knew it!  The truth is, the miracle didn't work. The pastor later accused some members of the church of participating in the urine abracadabra with low faith. So, his prayers could not be granted by God. I laughed. Another shocker came when I asked her why her phone line wasn't reachable. She responded : " Lordlaz , my pastor said we should sow a seed with what ever we had for the next miracle that was about coming, so I gave my phone. "
What! That phone is only a week old and it's a gift... !" I realized I was yelling. 
"Calm down  dear," she said. "God works in a mysterious way, better things will come. He said in his word : 'Give, and it shall be given unto you '. 
Only then, I realized that she and other members of the church (and in other folds alike) have been brainwashed. Are they not worse than the docile Boko Haram recruits with no mind of their own. 
I am a Christian,  I believe in God and Christ, his death, resurrection and second coming .i believe in God the father, son and Holy Spirit 
Does common sense freeze when we become born again? 


Never spend time praying when you should be working. 

Practice the act of giving but don't be cajoled or get religiously blackmailed into dubious seed sowing. The church should cater for the members not the other way round. 

Being born again should never stop you from reasoning .

Not every jargon from your pastor is valid 

It is irrational and gullible to believe fortune will smile on you when you forward some composed messages to a given number of people. 

Christ and God are not on social media. Be not deceived. 

Christ cannot ,will not and shall never  threaten you to broadcast or circulate messages via WhatsApp or any other platform. 

From a concerned Christian : Austine Lordlaz (c) 2018.

Sunday, 1 April 2018


Alright guys, Here is a fast peep into select film works of Director Austine Lordlaz. The show-reel below is a "collage" of his works as a Writer, Director, Producer, and Editor.Well, if you see some credits to him on Camera/Cinematography just smile, its one of those moments you would say "where there is no doctor" .Your comments and criticism will only make us get better. so, endeavor to drop some comments and hit us up for Film  and Theater production business ,+2348067928977 .